Friday, 8 May 2015

I Know What Hope Smells Like

Corruption has a smell.

It is the potent stench of urine and human waste that oozes off the pavement on a cool night in central Johannesburg. Parked next to the bus stop, the unassuming white van carries not just bread and warm soup, but hope and temporary relief from the lifeless glare of the city’s countless concrete giants. Paballo Ya Batho, it reads on the side panels, which loosely translated from Tswana means ‘Preserving the People’. Sheepishly I begin to hand out bread to these men, making my way slowly down the line and preluding each 5-sly handover with a trite unjani?-‘ how are you?’

They mostly stick to the scripted norm, nodding in acknowledgement before muttering that they are okay in some colloquial variation or another. Isn’t it amazing how, even in extraordinary circumstances like homelessness, we adhere so thoughtlessly to business-as-usual patterns?

As I continue down the line I find it harder and harder to look up and face the human being I am handing out charity to. It seems my soul wants to duck under the weight of their burdens, the plight of abject poverty in the city of gold which confronts me head-on. I go back to the van for another loaf. Now I can only bring myself to look at their hands, which tell a story- their story. These aren’t a plumber’s hands- calloused by splinters and mishits with the hammer. These are a struggler’s hands, darkened by the kind of dirt that makes clean spots conspicuous, or perhaps darkened by an untold act of desperation in an unlit alley- the only witness to a bout of misdirected rage.

In the moment, I don’t think these thoughts, I feel them. They course through my brain, down my spine, and across to my shoulders which probably arch under the tension. I can only write these words in hindsight because in medias res, I’m processing everything as and when it happens; poverty does not wait for reflective blog posts.

With my cognitive faculties so congested, my legs carry me on autopilot back up the sidewalk once I’ve reached the end of the line and run out of bread. My eyes begin scanning the pavement for someone I can talk to, you know, “minister to” as we say in Christianese. I really want to know their stories but, at the same time, the idea of forcing an inauthentic conversation/ in the name of altruistic religion nauseates me. While weighing this dilemma, I catch a glimpse of one middle-aged guy in particular, who unlike the many small groups that have formed seems uninterested in communal dialogue.

I’m drawn to him.

I ask him how he is, and of course he says he’s okay. “My name is Zama,” I say in isiZulu after sussing out from his name and accent that it’s safe to switch over to the vernacular. After finding out that he’s from Zimbabwe, I work out within milliseconds that going down Small Talk Avenue isn’t desirable for either one of us, so I decide to go straight to the heart of darkness: “how did you wind up on the streets?”
**********

What followed was fascinating but stays between myself and him. The real story here is that he, and all those people- mostly men, but also the many women and children on whose behalf they stood in the line- the real story is that they are there to begin with.

From the moment that smell hit my nose as I sat listening to this man’s story, I wondered, as an aspiring policymaker, about the extent to which underhanded monetary exchanges at the very highest levels of government were to blame for joblessness. I wondered about that clichéd term ‘corrupt officials’- how it makes the headlines so often it seems a given at times, a necessary irritation if you will. Common sense says it is not, but it is senseless how common these headlines are.

In my academic pursuits I’ve come across the term “illicit financial flows” and have been shocked at the numbers, the sheer volume of resources lost to my continent because someone wants it all to him/herself. Yet on that particular night in the middle of Johannesburg, it was not a numbers game. Corruption was looking me in the face, dressed in tattered robes. There she was in front of me, giving birth to a dim-faced young man who squatted beside me and told me his story of uncertainty and perseverance in a foreign land.

Nonetheless, another birth was happening in the back of a white van parked unassumingly besides a bus stop. The sound of it was alive in the friendly chatter between strangers rich and poor. I saw it on his face when the wall disintegrated and he smiled at me for the first time in our conversation. All is not lost for our continent and its leaders.


On Wednesday nights at the centre of Johannesburg, hope for a corruption-free Africa smells much like warm vegetable soup.

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